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2003-11-06 | 5:27 p.m.
<< Sigh.... >>


Is it Friday yet???

I ask Cindy that every day of the week...Monday through Thursday. :-)

I'm just hoping that tomorrow will fly by superfast. I'm more than ready for my weekend....this week has just been so draining!

Anyway...last night was our regular "Wing Night" at Hooters...I had some beer and some was okay, I guess. I almost didn't go. I was in a mood...and I was being a b*tch...and I knew that. But I just couldn't help myself.

Anyway, my mood finally lightened up a bit after I had my beer and wings. :-)

Beannie went with us last night...and I told her that Ruben wasn't gonna be there...because he never is when we go. Well...I lied. He was coming in just when we were leaving. Ruben's this guy that she's crushing on. She said she wants to have just one "fling" and I told her it's not gonna work out for her. First of all...she's married. And he may be an ass...but I know she loves the boy. And that's something she can't get rid of. Plus...she's a lot more capable of being hurt than me...Because I've been there...done that. She hasn't. I told her that even if she said she just wants a "fling"...she's always going to want more. But then she said, "But don't you just want to have just ONE moment sometimes? Just ONE." And I told her, "Of course I do! That's why I went that weekend to see Richard...because I want that moment. But you're always going to want more. And if I had another chance, I'd probably go again...even if I know that that's all it's gonna be...a moment. But you need to be prepared to get hurt." And she said, "Well...what are you trying to say? That I'm weak?" And I told her..."No...just emotionally."

One thing about my relationship with my Sissy...I'm always blunt with her...even if I know that what I tell her is gonna hurt her. I know I have to always tell her the truth for her own good. I won't just say things to make her feel better. That's just the way we are...all she needs is a good knock on the head sometimes. :-)

Anyway...Pete called me from a "private number" last night. It's because I haven't been picking up his calls...he's been getting on my nerves...and I haven't been feeling like dealing with them lately. He asked me why I haven't been picking up his calls...and I told him that I just haven't been feeling like talking to anybody lately...that I've been tired...and that I've been feeling sh*tty. He also wanted to know if I wanted to meet up for drinks sometime...with his friends...and my friends. I told him that we'll see. I know, I can be such a b*tch sometimes, but I just can't help it! Sometimes I just get fed up...and I end up taking it out on the wrong people. So spank me! :-)

Dennis called me last night, too...also asking why I didn't pick up his call on Monday. :-) (Update: Dennis is this bouncer we used to work with at DMX...Super Cute...also a major player...with a major "ass" tendency. So more than likely...I'll just keep him as a friend. He asked for my number when I saw him at DMX on Saturday...and drunk ol' me gave it to him. Why? Cause he looks good! So sue me...I'm superficial...what can I say?)

Like I said...I haven't been feeling like talking to anybody. It's just me. After talking on the freakin' phone all day...I just have no energy left to talk to anyone when I get when I'm home...I just want to stay quiet...and depress myself with my thoughts.

Before | After

last five

How the stars line up - 08.25.09

2008 already?! - 2008-01-07

Yet another transition... - 2006-09-27

Already been a year... - 2006-09-05

Too late... - 2006-06-30