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2003-08-20 | 3:56 p.m.
<< Missing Eric... >>


I was thinking...maybe the reason why I can't forget about Eric is cause he's freakin' everywhere! On Saturday night when we were chillin' at Esmer's, they came on T.V...and I just saw a glimpse of him and his favorite sunglasses that A.B. gave him and memories just kept pouring back like they usually do. Most of the time I'm okay. He'll cross my mind once in a while, but not as much as they used to. But lately...I dunno. It's weird. I wonder if he's okay. I heard he's having a baby by her...and I am glad that he has a family now to make him happy, cause I think he really needed that. But I just keep wondering "what if?"...and I know, I shouldn't. Maybe it wouldn't have worked out with us in the long run, anyway. He had little quirks that I didn't like...but all in all, we had fun together. He treated me really well...and that's one of the things that I cannot seem to forget. When I first met him, I never really thought there'd be more than just that. Oh, but there were. And they were sweet. I've never experienced a romantic walk by the beach...and I did that with him. The whole ferry ride...feeding the seagulls....the works. Those memories I'll take with me, no matter how many girls talk crap and try to hint to me that I didn't mean anything to him. And yeah, it hurts when I hear that. Cause I'd like to think that I was more than just any girl to him at one point. And I honestly think I was. He always made sure I was safe and always asked how I was doing. Silly old me....still has his e-mails. Keep them stored and everything. Like reading them will bring it all back. And I know it wouldn't...and I've thought about deleting those damn things sooo many times. But I just can't get myself to do it. I'd like to sit back and remember sometimes. Issues, I know...what can I say?! That's me. :-) Anyway...another lesson learned. Never date a musician...never date someone who would be everywhere even after you stop seeing each other...Everytime their song would come on the radio...a part of me feels like switching the station...but then again, demented ol' me just keeps it there and turns it up full blast and just let myself remember...It's weird, though. Everytime I think about him, I don't hurt...and I'm not angry at him for what he did...I just miss him....

Before | After

last five

How the stars line up - 08.25.09

2008 already?! - 2008-01-07

Yet another transition... - 2006-09-27

Already been a year... - 2006-09-05

Too late... - 2006-06-30